Stonewall and the Friend I Never Forgot

By Cleo Vivas-Rojas

Remembering My Friend: A Story of Courage and Identity

When I was a child, I had a friend, a little older than me—funny, dramatic, kind, and what some adults whispered as “strange” or “delicate.” To me, he was simply a friend. He wore my cousin’s skirts and high heels, dabbed on her makeup, and together they danced in front of the mirror to the pop hits of the early ’70s. It was joyful. Natural. Just who he was.

But the world wasn’t kind to boys like him. I remember so many days he knocked on my door, terrified and breathless, hiding from boys who wanted to hurt him. Much later, he confided in me that some of those “macho” boys had assaulted him at school. He carried the shame silently.

He was brave in ways I didn’t fully understand back then. In Caracas, during the ’70s and ’80s, wearing a skirt in public wasn’t just bold—it was dangerous. He faced rejection from his family and endured a life filled with hardship simply for being himself.

Eventually, he left for New York, hoping to live freely and pursue gender-affirming surgery. The last time I heard from him was a postcard—no return address—letting me know he had arrived. After that, nothing. We lost touch completely. I don’t even know if he ever got his surgery. I’ve often wondered what happened to him. Is he Alejandra now? Did he find the peace he was searching for? Did he have a happy life?

Why I Visited Stonewall During Pride Month

As June is the Pride month, I visited the Stonewall National Monument and the Stonewall National Museum Visitor Center in New York City. Standing in front of that historic bar in Greenwich Village—now honored as the birthplace of the modern LGBTQ+ rights movement—I couldn’t help but think of my dear friend. As I walked through the exhibits and read each story, I saw glimpses of him, and of others I’ve known, people who may have never been near Stonewall, or even alive during those events, but who carried the same pain, the same courage, and the same longing to be accepted for who they were.

The Stonewall Uprising and Its Lasting Legacy

The Stonewall Uprising began in the early hours of June 28, 1969, when patrons of the Stonewall Inn resisted yet another police raid. What followed was six days of protests, led by queer and trans people—especially trans women of color—who had been pushed too far for too long. Their defiance sparked a movement.

In June 2016, President Barack Obama designated Stonewall and its surrounding area as the first U.S. National Monument dedicated to LGBTQ+ rights. And in 2019, on the 50th anniversary of the uprising, he voiced his continued support by championing the Equality Act, a landmark bill to protect LGBTQ+ Americans from discrimination. These victories are not just symbols—they are hard-won affirmations of dignity and the right to live freely.

Carrying his spirit forward

I don’t know if my friend is still alive, but wherever he is, I hope he found what he was looking for. Every time I read about a new LGBTQ+ right protected, or a monument raised, or a march held, I feel joy for him. He deserved to live openly, to love freely, and to be safe—like everyone else.

To my dear friend

Thank you for being part of my life during my childhood and teenage years. I’m proud of you—for standing tall in your truth, even when the world tried to change you. You faced judgment, rejection, and danger, yet you never stopped being yourself. Through you, I learned one of the most important lessons of my life: to accept people exactly as they are. Your courage lives on in my heart, and I carry your spirit with me—always.

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Stonewell National Monument Visitor Center is located at 51 Christopher Street, New York, NY 10014

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All photos are from Cleo Vivas-Rojas but the 2 photos from the Stonewell National Monument

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